The Lonely Loveliness of Snow

Hey, guys!
   I know my friends and family back in the Houston area are complaining about 78 degree temps, so let me just give you a glimpse into our Budapest weather at the moment. There is currently about a foot of snow on the ground in my yard. Yesterday the sun came out for a blissful few hours, and the snow on roofs and balconies began to melt a bit, but the air temperature remained below freezing for the day, as it has been for the past 5 days. Five days. Of below freezing temperatures. You guys, it's one thing to step outside and to be grateful for pockets to keep your hands warm on a cold day; it is another thing entirely to step outside and have any bit of unprotected skin immediately begin stinging as the frozen air slaps that 98.6 degrees right off the surface. To safely go outside, you have to prepare 30 minutes beforehand by putting on an additional 12 layers of warm, waterproof clothing.
    Last year, the snow was a novelty. This year, I am seriously ready for spring.
    In all seriousness, though, there is a depressing loneliness that accompanies the gray days of winter. I had heard of Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD), but even with my firsthand knowledge of depression, I questioned its actuality. After walking into the elementary school counselor's office this morning and falling apart over little nothings, I can tell you, SAD exists, and for good reason.
   As mentioned before, it takes time and effort to get dressed to go out in this weather, so even if the sun does make a quick appearance, you sometimes talk yourself out of the effort of soaking up some Vitamin D. When there is snow and ice on the ground, it is difficult to find the motivation to get out of the car at school drop-off, so you kiss the kids, watch them walk in, and then you drive away, never speaking to or connecting with the few English speaking friends you would have had in your day. The roads can be messy and dangerous, so rather than have your friend meet you at a coffee shop, you tell them to stay home where they are safe. There is an isolation that can come from the elements. The hibernation can be nice and needed at times, but when connection with people is what gives you refreshment and life, sitting inside your snow globe of a house can be a very lonely thing.

  I promise I did not write this post to depress you guys or make you worry about me. I am treating myself with grace, preaching the Gospel to myself, taking my Prozac and chocolate regularly, and excercising to keep the Serotonin flowing. What I really intend in writing this post is if you are in a place where it is 78 degrees, I want to challenge you to get together with your people and to be grateful that the weather is encouraging community rather than isolation.
   I was listening to my favorite podcast (The Happy Hour with Jamie Ivey), and she had a guest on her show who talked about this awesome thing she does called Neighbor's Table. (*see more info here) She just has people over, gathered around an outdoor dining table. They share a meal, and they enjoy sweet conversation. They connect and share life, even if they began the evening as strangers. Y'all. You can bet your sweet apple pie that once Spring comes to Budapest, I will be doing something of the sort. As much as I love alone time, I believe God created us to do life together. This season of hibernation will come to an end (praise Jesus), and when it does, I want to have my heart and my home ready for people to be welcomed into our space.
   But my friends back in Texas, you have no excuse to not get on this now. Today. If you can safely drive to a girlfriend's house and have coffee while you fold each other's laundry, that is life-giving. If two families can get together in one of your backyards and let the kids run and play while you sit and drink tea, you will all be blessed. A potluck dinner shared among friends new and old can only lead to more shared life in the future. You need to do this... because your soul needs it...and because 2000 miles away, I am counting down the days until the snow melts and I can invite people to come to my house and be the best medicine for my SAD.
 

   Last week, Clark, the kids, my mother-in-law, sister-in-law, and I were in Austria skiing in the Alps (life is really hard for us, I know). We had a wonderful time, and Clark and the big kids are becoming great skiers. Our next vacation will be with friends to Dubai--- FRIENDS+SUNSHINE! WHOOHOO. Here are some pictures from our week in Austria.

Love you more than hot chocolate!
xoxox
Katelyn

How to Stop Being a People Pleaser

    Good afternoon from the once again snow-covered hills of Buda.
    As most of my friends and family know, I really like for people to be happy, especially in relation to me. It is very important that I always do the right thing, whatever that may be, and I struggle with wanting to somehow ensure everyone else's satisfaction with my performance in life. This is not always possible, nor should it be our focus in life. Below are some helpful tips on how to overcome the issue of people pleasing.

1.)Move to a foreign country.

     I don't speak the language. You don't speak English. You want to read my gas meter, but I
    don't know where it is.
    There was a sign on the road back there that looks like I'm approaching a railroad crossing, but   
    now someone is yelling at me in Hungarian and motioning with their hands that they want me to
    move my car...
    I'm sorry I am going slow, but I am deathly afraid of being pulled over by the police here.

    See Hungarian driving laws here.

Could you please pour my latte into a disposable paper cup? Because I forgot that the standard is a real, latte glass, and you expect me to sit and read while I enjoy my coffee. In America, the standard is "to-go".  I'm not saying that's right, but I am feeling guilty about making you, Mr. Barista, change my coffee into a paper cup.

I forgot to label my produce with the SKU, so now you, un-smiling-grocery-checker-lady, can either wait while I go weigh my bananas, or you can put them back later.

2.) Have Three Children.
I think, instead, that should just read, "Have children." Just TRY to keep everyone else in the world happy while you pinch your misbehaving two year old. Somebody won't like the misbehavior, but somebody won't like the discipline. Good luck.

No matter how much I try, those little people are bound to sin at some point today, and I feel like if they mess up or bother someone or breathe, I will receive "the look" from some perfect person at some point in my day implying that surely I could do better. Nope. I am leaning hard on Jesus, I'm already tired tomorrow, and the doctor said I should run instead of take prozac (Hahaha. She's got a sense of humor, that one does.). If you want to enter my circus, these monkeys will become your monkeys.


3.)Hire a house cleaner.
    Y'all. Okay, so this is an area where I'm still a work in progress. The non-people pleaser
    Katelyn would be like, "Hello! Here's my house. Thank you so much!"
    I am so worried about how my mess will reflect on me that I literally just lied to the new house
   cleaner. "I'm so sorry about how messy the house is. I've been sick for, like, two weeks."
 
   If you add the word "like", it can be hyperbole, right? It felt like I was sick for two weeks, but it   
   was one..., and it was a month ago.  Really I was just trying to throw my husband and kids under
   the bus for the messy state of my house. WE ARE ALL TO BLAME! And why am I apologizing
   for my messy house and all the work they will have to do? Why am I seeking their approval? I have
   just guaranteed them job security. In fact, one pulled me aside a few minutes ago and said very
   kindly, "If you call my number, I can come more often." Sounds like a win for all of us!


   So there you have it, friends, my tips for how to stop being a people pleaser. Let me know how these tips work for you and if you have any other tips and tricks you would like to add.

BIG HUGS FROM BUDAPEST!

Foreign Exchanges

   Sziastok! (*Howdy, y'all!)

    January somehow disappeared, and I've been told we are already to the 3rd day of February! Between sick kids and then succumbing to "The Budapest Plague" myself (a really bad cold... possibly the flu), the last few weeks have left me feeling disconnected from "normal" life. Strangely, I draw comfort from knowing that Texans are dealing with the flu, too... like it's not an issue isolated to my current setting. That probably sounds terrible, like, "Yay! Y'all are sick, too!" I guess a common problem just makes the distance not feel so great. 

   Something I absolutely love about our time here is all the amazing people from all around the world that I get to do life with. We live in Hungary, so obviously there are many Hungarians with whom we interact on a regular basis, but the diversity within my social circles makes my heart happy. I regularly enjoy coffee with women from The Netherlands, Romania or Canada. A hug from my friend from India is a welcome greeting in the middle of the week. Last week Clark and I ate haggis and danced to Scottish folk songs at the Burns Supper with our Scottish friend. "Hello, mate!" from a New Zealand-er always makes me smile. Waving at my English friend when it looks like no one is in the driver's seat of her car is a bit unnerving, but then I remember her car is from the UK. In my short time in Hungary, I have made acquaintances with people from every corner of the world, and in getting to know them and a small bit about their culture, my life has been so enriched. 

    Being that we non-Hungarians are all in a land foreign to us, we have arrived on fairly neutral territory. There are perhaps European similarities from country to country that might afford one expat a slight advantage over another, but in general, we are all here representing our unique cultures, not trying to assimilate or blend in with the Hungarians, just trying to live well among many people different from us. And the varied struggles to maintain our individual, cultural norms somehow unite us. 

 

  Another blog for anther day would be about how different Texans are from the rest of the United States... 

  Sending Texas-sized hugs from Budapest!

   

Spring Break in Rome

   Ciao! We have been back from Rome for a week, and as I look through pictures, I smile at the thought that we are having such adventures when we thought we would never leave Southeast Texas. God has a great sense of humor. 

Our neighborhood churches

Looking down from our apartment

   Traveling with children is always a trip, but adding a giant toddler to the mix is bound to be exciting. The big kids are seriously rockstar travelers, and Titus fell into the groove pretty well. We stayed in our first AirBnB, which was a good experience, and we walked everywhere, at least 5 kilometers a day. We were about a four minute walk to the Pantheon or Plazza Novona, depending on which way you turned out of our neighborhood. Our favorite coffee shop was just around the corner from our apartment, and each night the children were lulled to sleep with accordion music from the restaurants below.

The view from our apartment's rooftop terrace

My favorite macchiato

    Rome is quite family friendly, but we were surprised that, despite the numerous plazas, fountains, and pedestrian friendly areas, there were no playgrounds or parks. Budapest has spoiled us in that regard. The children loved going into the beautiful churches which were everywhere, and their first thought after breakfast was where we would go for gelato. We tried many different gelato stores and many different flavors, but the grown-ups' favorite was one near our apartment that had chocolate tartufo, chocolate truffle ice cream with a light dusting of cocoa powder. Emma liked the gelato store that offered 150 flavors, and after trying quite a few, her favorite was KitKat. Ransom and Titus were both happy with any gelato you offered them from anywhere at any time. 

     The children's favorite part of our trip was Gladiator School. Emma and Ransom were led through a museum of the history of Roman weaponry and gladiators, and then their gladiator guide put them through gladiator basic training. They learned basic gladius and shield moves, and then the "fought" against other trainees in the "arena". They loved every minute, and it helped them have a better understanding of what went on in the Colosseum. 

The Pantheon Oculus

Clark and Titus at Titus's Arch

    Clark and I very much enjoyed the Roman Forum and Palatino, and I loved the Pantheon. Walking around a city with standing architecture pre-dating Christ is pretty surreal. We enjoyed walking around Vatican City, and the Sistine Chapel was amazing, but it was so incredibly crowded, that we felt we didn't get to appreciate it as we would have liked (*For me, this would have been lying on the floor staring up at ceilings.). Also, Titus was done after about two hours, so we went to find more gelato. 

Trevi Fountain

    We left Rome with sunny skies and 70 degree temps to return to a freezing, snowy Budapest (in April!). The weather here has decided to become more spring-like in the last few days which makes me a little less antsy to hop on a plane and get back to Italy. We are happy to be home, but we are looking forward to our next adventure, wherever that may be!
        Hugs from Budapest!

Catch Us if You Can!

   Howdy from the multi-colored hills of Buda!

   The leaves have all changed gorgeous hues of gold, red, and orange, and the evergreens are standing tall as the air turns cooler. The sun has been hiding more often than not, but on days it appears, we make good use of our time outdoors. 

Handsome Husband and Titus surveying the land 

   This past Saturday we soaked up every ounce of sunshine we could by adventuring to a castle in a neighboring village and a lookout on top of the hill we view from our living room. It was a wonderful day full of sight-seeing and laughter. The big kids are getting really good at hiking. Clark is still feeling the burn from carrying Titus on his back the whole day. 

Emma and Ransom bundled up and looking at the village below

 We started our day at Solyamari Var (Solyamar Castle). It is the ruins of a castle originally built around 1355. For 1000 HUF (About $4 USD) we got to walk around the remains of the turrets, water tower, and imagine what it would have been like for knights to walk along the high walls. The views were lovely, and it was a nice start to our morning.

The Lookout

   Next we drove down the road and parked at the base of a hill across from our house. We followed the steep and slightly rocky path up to what we know as the Pagoda. It is a lookout on the top of the hill, and from it you can see the Danube River, Pest, and Buda. We were even able to zoom in with the camera and find our house.

Our house from the lookout

Pretty church on the hill surrounded by autumn color

People Parasailing off the hill

    We followed our hikes with a lunch of hamburgers and fries from Sunny Diner. It is a cute burger joint with "American" food and VH1 90s countdown on the TV. I think we have gone back because Clark and I like the music so much. I still haven't found a hamburger I would say was good, but if you close your eyes and pretend you're at Whataburger... No. It still isn't. But when the scenery is as great as what we get to enjoy, I really don't feel like there is much reason to complain.

   The kids are doing really well. Emma is loving 2nd grade and is making some really good friends. Ransom enjoys kindergarten, but he really doesn't see the need to go EVERY day. Titus is weighing in at a solid 29 pounds, wearing 18 month clothes and always smiling (except when you put him in his carseat). Clark and I are enjoying this season of lots of time together, and we are grateful for your prayers and love from around the globe.

    We will try to keep you posted as our time in Budapest flies by! Hugs and blessings!

Catch Us if You Can!

   Howdy from the multi-colored hills of Buda!

   The leaves have all changed gorgeous hues of gold, red, and orange, and the evergreens are standing tall as the air turns cooler. The sun has been hiding more often than not, but on days it appears, we make good use of our time outdoors. 

Handsome Husband and Titus surveying the land 

   This past Saturday we soaked up every ounce of sunshine we could by adventuring to a castle in a neighboring village and a lookout on top of the hill we view from our living room. It was a wonderful day full of sight-seeing and laughter. The big kids are getting really good at hiking. Clark is still feeling the burn from carrying Titus on his back the whole day. 

Emma and Ransom bundled up and looking at the village below

 We started our day at Solyamari Var (Solyamar Castle). It is the ruins of a castle originally built around 1355. For 1000 HUF (About $4 USD) we got to walk around the remains of the turrets, water tower, and imagine what it would have been like for knights to walk along the high walls. The views were lovely, and it was a nice start to our morning.

The Lookout

   Next we drove down the road and parked at the base of a hill across from our house. We followed the steep and slightly rocky path up to what we know as the Pagoda. It is a lookout on the top of the hill, and from it you can see the Danube River, Pest, and Buda. We were even able to zoom in with the camera and find our house.

Our house from the lookout

Pretty church on the hill surrounded by autumn color

People Parasailing off the hill

    We followed our hikes with a lunch of hamburgers and fries from Sunny Diner. It is a cute burger joint with "American" food and VH1 90s countdown on the TV. I think we have gone back because Clark and I like the music so much. I still haven't found a hamburger I would say was good, but if you close your eyes and pretend you're at Whataburger... No. It still isn't. But when the scenery is as great as what we get to enjoy, I really don't feel like there is much reason to complain.

   The kids are doing really well. Emma is loving 2nd grade and is making some really good friends. Ransom enjoys kindergarten, but he really doesn't see the need to go EVERY day. Titus is weighing in at a solid 29 pounds, wearing 18 month clothes and always smiling (except when you put him in his carseat). Clark and I are enjoying this season of lots of time together, and we are grateful for your prayers and love from around the globe.

    We will try to keep you posted as our time in Budapest flies by! Hugs and blessings!

Catch Us if You Can!

   Howdy from the multi-colored hills of Buda!

   The leaves have all changed gorgeous hues of gold, red, and orange, and the evergreens are standing tall as the air turns cooler. The sun has been hiding more often than not, but on days it appears, we make good use of our time outdoors. 

Handsome Husband and Titus surveying the land 

   This past Saturday we soaked up every ounce of sunshine we could by adventuring to a castle in a neighboring village and a lookout on top of the hill we view from our living room. It was a wonderful day full of sight-seeing and laughter. The big kids are getting really good at hiking. Clark is still feeling the burn from carrying Titus on his back the whole day. 

Emma and Ransom bundled up and looking at the village below

 We started our day at Solyamari Var (Solyamar Castle). It is the ruins of a castle originally built around 1355. For 1000 HUF (About $4 USD) we got to walk around the remains of the turrets, water tower, and imagine what it would have been like for knights to walk along the high walls. The views were lovely, and it was a nice start to our morning.

The Lookout

   Next we drove down the road and parked at the base of a hill across from our house. We followed the steep and slightly rocky path up to what we know as the Pagoda. It is a lookout on the top of the hill, and from it you can see the Danube River, Pest, and Buda. We were even able to zoom in with the camera and find our house.

Our house from the lookout

Pretty church on the hill surrounded by autumn color

People Parasailing off the hill

    We followed our hikes with a lunch of hamburgers and fries from Sunny Diner. It is a cute burger joint with "American" food and VH1 90s countdown on the TV. I think we have gone back because Clark and I like the music so much. I still haven't found a hamburger I would say was good, but if you close your eyes and pretend you're at Whataburger... No. It still isn't. But when the scenery is as great as what we get to enjoy, I really don't feel like there is much reason to complain.

   The kids are doing really well. Emma is loving 2nd grade and is making some really good friends. Ransom enjoys kindergarten, but he really doesn't see the need to go EVERY day. Titus is weighing in at a solid 29 pounds, wearing 18 month clothes and always smiling (except when you put him in his carseat). Clark and I are enjoying this season of lots of time together, and we are grateful for your prayers and love from around the globe.

    We will try to keep you posted as our time in Budapest flies by! Hugs and blessings!

2 out of 3 in School

Good morning from Hungary!

   Today is a beautiful, 75 degree day in Budapest. It is also Emma Jane's 4th day of 2nd grade and Anthony Ransom's 2nd day of Kindergarten. They are attending the American International School of Budapest, which is really an international school run in the style of an American school. Emma and Ransom are in classes comprised of students from all over the world.  Both children were incredibly excited to start school, and they have loved every part of it so far.

     I was emotionally prepared for Emma to go back to school. I thought I was emotionally prepared for Ransom to start kindergarten. I mean, there was a time when I didn't even know if I would like that kid (see blog post here), but low and behold, I really, really like him, and I really, really miss him. He asked if he could walk by himself to his class on his first day, to which I replied, "Of course not". He walked into his classroom all smiles, hung his backpack in his cubby and took out his folder as though he had been doing these routines for months. I shouted a "Bye!" and "I love you!", and then he looked at me with concerned eyes, realizing this was harder on me than him. He came over to where I was and gave me a tight hug, and then ran off to play at centers. I was pretty choked up as I walked Emma to the stairs before she headed up to her classroom. As Titus and I walked out the doors, all I could think about was Handsome Ransom, age 4 sitting on top of a piece of playground equipment at the park we used to go to. They grow fast.

Even the second kid.

And every goodbye is hard. 

  

  While driving around the city, I have been thinking about things I should blog about.

Here are a few random observations.

• Lots and lots of people here smoke cigarettes. It's just what they do. They may walk everywhere and eat healthy, but they also smoke. Emma and Ransom made a game out of counting cigarette butts. I think Ransom decided to just round up to 9,874 billion.
• Most people here have some form of a tattoo somewhere on their bodies, and there are many people with body piercings. The tattoos are usually colorful and in obvious places. It seems they do not worry about being disqualified from a job based on body art as would be a consideration (whether right or wrong) in America. 
• The average age of women having children (first babies) is well over 30. The pregnant women I have seen at the doctor's office were in their mid-forties. I am considered quite young to have as many children as I have, especially a 7 year old. 
• Public transportation (bus, tram, subway) and walking is considered the norm. Upper middle-class people take the bus to work. The people here think Americans are crazy for the amount of time we spend in the car. I have developed a love for the tram. For about $10 a month, I can have someone drive me all around town all I want while I read, sleep, or make eye-contact with my children. 
• European butter is amazing. 

I think I'm going to go have some bread and butter now. 

HUGS!

   

Things we Take for Granted in the States...

   It is important to me that my blog present you with an honest look at our adventures. Yesterday, I sincerely meant everything I said about how amazingly well we are doing. However, there are still hard moments... hard days... and the longing for comforts of what I know. A friend and I were messaging one another about the therapeutic benefits of cookie dough, and while I made a really good batch last week, I had to make my own brown sugar and I didn't have my Kitchenaid mixer.
   Perspective is a crucial part of our experience here. Clark and I know we are where God has us for a purpose, and the things that seem hard are usually fairly small in the big scheme of things. I did begin thinking up a list of things we take for granted, Americans especially.


Drying clothes in an American clothes dryer
    Our dryer does not have a vent to the outside. It spins the water out of the clothes and into a reservoir that you have to empty after each load. There are two lint filters which also require emptying after each load. Each small load requires at least 2 hours to dry, usually 4, though. We will be getting a clothes line soon.

Street signs with the names of streets
    The names of streets are written on the corner of the last building of the street. If you are walking, this is fine, but  when you are driving, this makes things a little tricky. Apparently Google Maps and other navigation helps are aware of this, because they don't even bother to tell you the names of streets on which to turn. They say silly things like, "Sharp left in 200 meters" or "Slight right in 1.7 km".

Good coffee
   I've heard people brag about Turkish coffee. We have yet to find some that does not taste like shoe leather.

Not sweet cereal
   Apparently the Hungarian people like to start their day with dessert. I am a huge fan of their pastries, particularly the sour cherry pies or alma lavalas (apple turnovers), but we are all craving some plain Cheerios.

Computers that come with Windows OS.
    That was fun. Especially since it was in Hungarian.

Accessibility to Over-the-Counter Medication
   All medications must be purchased at pharmacies, prescription or not, and not all "over-the-counter" medications are available without a prescription.

Free public restrooms
    Better keep some coins in your pocket!

Central Air Conditioning or Air Conditioned Public Spaces
    Sometimes stores have air at the front when you first walk in, but as you continue shopping toward the back of the store, you notice the air is a little warmer... and heavier... Our house has AC in the family room and in each of the bedrooms. Each one has a remote control and the ability to set the temperature and the fan speed, but if it is on, it is always on and blowing air. There is no such thing as reaching a comfortable temperature. People think we are crazy for even running our AC. Ever.


   Every now and then I may sneak in a few more things, kind of like Jimmy Fallon's "Thank You Letters", but for now, I'm going to go restart the dryer and then play with my kids.

Much Love,
Katelyn


  

One Month in Budapest!

   Szia from the "Pearl of the Danube"!

   Please forgive us for the radio-silence this past month, but we have enjoyed the time to settle in and explore our new homeland.

   Budapest is an absolutely beautiful city. It has history and architecture as well as glorious views. The current temperature is 65 degrees F, and as I sit and type, my view is of the pear tree in my yard and past that the beautiful Buda hills. Clark and I have to regularly remind ourselves we get to live here, that we aren't just on vacation for a few weeks. It is completely surreal.
 

   Overall, we are all doing remarkably well. The kids adjusted quickly to the time difference, and they are loving the relaxed pace of life in Europe. Clark is doing well at his new job, learning the language quickly and serving as our tour guide for parts of the city. I am enjoying figuring out cooking and daily life in an unfamiliar place, made better by the gorgeous scenery and climate. We all think our two year assignment may go by too quickly.

   We began our adventure in an apartment in the bustling heart of Pest. This was an interesting way to be thrust into European culture, but as Clark and I have always been attracted to life in the city, we enjoyed our time there. We walked everywhere, ate at fun restaurants, and played in city parks. Our apartment was directly on top of restaurants and karaoke bars, and though it put a damper on our open windows at night, it was fun to hear the lively music and laughter in the evenings.

   From there we moved into our house in the woods, still in Budapest, but now on the Buda side of the Danube River. Pest is known to be flat as a pancake and very metropolitan while Buda is hilly and more peaceful. Our house is on what was once a massive estate, set back about 60 meters from the peaceful road which faces woods and a nature preserve. Our pants are fitting a little loser as our house has three stories-- garage/basement, "ground floor", and "1st floor". We have a great view of the hills from our den, and the tram is about an 8 minute walk from our gate. Clark did a FABULOUS job finding us this house.

   Things that have been tricky mostly revolve around the language and our expectation that things be done quickly. In regard to the language, many younger people know some English, but many things are still lost in translation. I have not met an English speaker at the grocery store yet, and they usually assume I speak Hungarian, so I do a lot of nodding and smiling. Most older women come up and touch Titus's thighs, and say something with a smile on their face. I hope they are saying something like "Wow, he sure is sturdy," or something like that. Regarding timely expectations, we joke that when a person from Hungary tells you something will take 5 minutes, they really mean 30. Everything takes a liiiiitttlllle biiiitttt looooonnnger here. If you plan to quickly drop off some paperwork at the school, think again. You will be invited in to sit and have a glass of viz (water) and chat about random things for at least an hour. I have come to realize that culturally, Americans are a very hurried people, and in our rush to get things done, we have lost much of our hospitality. The Hungarians I have met are incredibly hospitable, and they regularly put people before tasks.

   I look forward to posting more and giving you all a glimpse into our lives in Budapest! We have room for guests, so come visit!

Much Love,
Katelyn, Clark, Emma, Ransom, and Titus